You'd think . . .

. . . I lived in the UK.

Punctuation was discussing UK English pronunciation, and it reminded me that some county, city, street or road names around here are repeats of UK place names.

Either the original settlers were homesick - or they had absolutely no imagination.

We have Norfolk, Hampton, Suffolk, Portsmouth and Surrey to name a few.

The names are the same, but the pronunciations wander a little from the UK. For example, there are at least four common pronunciations for Norfolk.

NOR folk - From visitors or TV announcers that have never visited here.
NAH f'k - From southern people trying to get it right.
Norfik - From someone trying to get it right, but who thinks the correct pronunciation is obscene.
NORf'k - From people who have a clue.

Strangely, in Nebraska, Norfolk is most often pronounced Norfork. Ask Lisa.

Or, here is the "official" explanation:

The name "Norfolk" is traditionally pronounced "Norfork" by Nebraskans. When the city was incorporated (as a village) in 1881, it was named after the "north fork" tributary of the Elkhorn River on which it lies. The United States Postal Service assumed that "Norfork" was a mistake and changed the name to "Norfolk". This became the official spelling, but the local pronunciation did not change.

As usual, the government bollixed it up.

A story about my mother . . .

My mother was a social worker. She started working in the local department of public aid - commonly called the "relief office" - when my grandfather became ill. She did well enough there that she was hired by the State of Illinois to work out of the county office.

When I was about twelve years old, my mother brought a young lady home with her. For privacy, I'll call her Mary.

Mary did all of our cleaning, laundry and most of the cooking. I asked mom why Mary was living with us, and she told me that she needed help around the house because she and dad both had full time jobs. Besides, mom had to spend extra hours at work because her cases ranged all across the county.

It looked to me like Mary was pregnant, and I finally asked mom if that was the case. It was, and about six months later, Mary had a little girl. I can't for the life of me remember her name, but I remember Mary rocking her in a little room next to mine. Eventually, Mary left, and I didn't think much about it. I just assumed she got a different job and moved on.

It must have been twenty years later, when Mrs. B and I were visiting home, that I remembered Mary and asked mom why she lived with us for a while.

Here's the real story: Mary and her husband moved to Illinois just a few months before. When her husband realized she was pregnant, he abandoned her and disappeared. Mary had no family in the area, and no family to go back to. Because she lived in Illinois such a short time, Mary was ineligible for public aid. My mother couldn't find any way for the state to help her, so she brought Mary home to live with us until she met the residency requirements.

I think of that story now and again, and it's just one of the hundreds of reasons why I've always been proud of mom.

Postscript:
The rocking chair . . . all three of our children were rocked in it, including Lisa. Lisa rocked TLK in it also, and it's sitting in Lisa's living room.

No roses . . .

. . . but more guns.

Do you realize how many common sayings derive from firearms?

Lock, stock and barrel. From the major parts of a rifle.

Going off half-cocked. Old muskets had a half-cock notch for the hammer - the old version of a safety. If that notch was worn, the musket could fire from the half-cock position. That was not a good thing.

Flash in the pan. Flintlocks had a covered "pan" near a hole leading to the powder charge in the barrel. A very sensitive powder was dribbled into the pan so that the flint would ignite it and fire the gun. If the gun was dirty, the primer powder would "flash" without igniting the musket.

A scattergun approach. Scattergun is slang for a shotgun, which shoots a wide ranging pattern.

Shot in the dark. Used to be you couldn't aim in the dark, so you took your chances.

He has a hair trigger. A trigger takes a certain amount of pull to fire the weapon. Some folks lighten that pull until (exaggerated, of course) the weight of a hair will fire it.

Loose cannon. A cannon that is not properly secured can shoot just about anywhere - including places you don't want to shoot.

He has a short fuse. A cannon with a short fuse will fire before you want it to.

A smoking gun is easier to identify than one that has not been recently fired.

You can read this or not, but don't shoot me down . . .

Guns N' Roses . . .

. . . latest album will be released on 23 NOV.

Title: Chinese Democracy. It's only 15 years late.

Their last was "The Spaghetti Incident," which bascially sucked.

Their other albums ranged from very good to outstanding.

1987: Appetite for Destruction
1988: G N' R Lies
1991: Use Your Illusion I
1991: Use Your Illusion II

Why do I care?

I first saw the GNR crew in cameos in "The Dead Pool" with Clint Eastwood. "Welcome to the Jungle" was included in the soundtrack. After that, I became a big GNR fan.

Mrs. B and I even had tickets for the 1991 GNR show in Kansas City. It didn't work out. The previous week, Axl started a riot at the St. Louis show, and there was an arrest warrant for him in Missouri. Knsas City was cancelled. I was seriously bummed.

GNR Lies is in the stereo in my car. I was listening to it yesterday.

Axl was (is?) a head case. Slash, Izzy, Duff and Adler were serious alcoholic druggies.

Regardless, they could really rock. Usually.

Dooce's Hypothetical question . . .

. . . reminded me of something that happened two summers ago.

As I was leaving a grocery store, I was approached by a young lady I'd guess to be about 35. She looked to be tired, and more than a little distressed. She told me she was embarassed to ask, but had spent her last money on food for her kids, but hadn't checked her gas gauge and was afraid she couldn't make it back home. She pointed to a beat-up old car. I could see a baby seat and some toys, but no kids were in the car.

Now, I don't give handouts to everyone who asks for them, but this lady's story just seemed believable. I gave her a ten, and she thanked me several times, and there was a tear in the corner of her eye.

After she left, another lady who had been watching decided to butt in:

Her: Boy, she really took you in.
Me: Pardon?
Her: How stupid can you be? She's just going to buy drugs with that.
Me: Maybe, but at least she isn't a nosy BITCH who can't mind her own business.

As I pulled out of the parking lot, I saw the woman I gave the money to pulling up to a gas pump across the street. . .

Absolutely my last post . . .

. . . on politics, that is.

I'm sick of it. The campaigning, that is.

Issues have taken a back seat to sound bites.

Most of the folks who claim to be journalists are nothing but party flacks. They deny, deny, deny, but it still comes across in their reporting.

There's little discussion about how good one's party is. It's all about how bad the other is.

Debates are all about answering questions that weren't asked. More sound bites.

What's worse, based on the comments from "Joe Citizen" in blogs, on TV, and in the news, I'm convinced that at least 50% of the people who will mark an "X" in November are either too ill-informed, or just too freaking stupid to vote.

And, not because they prefer a different candidate than I. Because they can't articulate a coherent reason.

I'm done. I'm done blogging about it. I'm done discussing it. I'm done watching debates. I'm done watching the Sunday news shows.

I've studied the issues. I've identified my political philosophy. I know where the candidates stand.

Mark the "X" for whomever you choose. You'll deserve what you get.

So will I.

I don't usually get this coarse . . .

. . . but, TOUGH SHIT!

NEW YORK (Reuters) - New York Gov. David Paterson on Friday pledged not to raise taxes, even as he predicted an increase in the state's budget deficit to $2 billion amid fallout from the credit crisis and recalled the legislature for a special session next month to address the economy.

Paterson, a Democrat, said he feared Wall Street, which accounts for one out of every five tax dollars in the state, could slash bonuses by 60 percent and capital gains tax collections could plunge by about 50 percent.

Paterson said Wall Street bonuses generate 30 percent of the state's taxes in the January to March quarter.

Considering what's been going on in the financial markets, doesn't this fall in the category of poetic justice?

And, since poetry was mentioned . . .

Poetry . . . shows what should or must occur, rather than merely what does occur.
- Aristotle

That also seems relevant to the topic does it not?

Ian?